07 February 2006

skating with celebrities...*

* snipey bitch alert...
mommy and daddy do not watch this television program. and they don't want to. but, after catching a blurb on cnn this morning about one of the "better" skaters on the hit fox show, mommy had to laugh and laugh and laugh! that's because mommy thinks it's veryvery funny that someone she not only knows, but worked with many years ago, is considered on of the "better" celebrity skaters in the competition. who's that, you ask? jillian barberie (aka jillian warry). and just why is this funny to mommy? because, in her youth, jillian was a competitive ice skater in canada, which seems, at least to mommy, an obvious advantage in a show where part of the fun (or so she's heard) is watching celebrities move outside their comfort zone in order to entertain the masses.
mommy is familiar with jillian's past because she (mommy) created and produced a news segment in miami for jillian to appear in, which took advantage of jillian's unique athletic abilities and unbeliveably bawdy sense of humor (jillian's bio says she reported for another of mommy's segments, but that's pretty much a lie from the pits of hell, because mommy can only remember allowing jillian to appear in the segment once or twice...but i digress). mommy used to crack up every time she'd go out on a shoot with jillian, because she (jillian) would blahblahblah so much and so fast, and say so many inappropriate things during tapings, that it was often a big challenge for mommy to find one or two usable phrases out of the hours and hours of tape that would be shot for each of the weekly pieces. mommy was always grateful for the team of highly specialized editors she worked with, because those guys kicked serious video ass! since they were capable of creating video magic, despite the verbal manglings.
of course, mommy has no way of knowing whether or not jillian's former life has ever been mentioned--she assumes it has been--and, she figures good for jillian... (she really does). mommy's not bitter at all that the bimbo she was forced to turn into an articulate tv personality now has recurring brushes with fame. mommy thinks it's great fun that a woman who must be, what, 49? 57? 62? whatever. mommy thinks it's great that an older woman can still look so damn good in a crop top and tight jeans that she continues to be regarded as a sex object symbol by pimply-faced adolescent boys. okay... so mommy's own not-so-pimply-faced boys think jillian's hot, too. but that's beside the point, if i had a point... which i don't.
alrighty then... i think the time has come for me to toss mommy in the shower. as far as i can tell she really needs to wash some of this bitchiness off before it sets in... trust me, she's not usually so snarky, and, with god as my witness, she'll never be so again! or, maybe she will, but you won't have to hear about it. tho', maybe you will. ya know, basically, it all boils down to my own level of bitchiness on any given day. my blog, my call.
"My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am." ~ Author Unknown

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