11 January 2006

we like money...

(okay, so i don't actually know what money is, but that's beside the point... i hear it's useful) according to mommy, money is the reason daddy gets up at that godawful hour each weekday... it's what causes mommy to sweat and curse and bemoan impulsive/unnecessary purchases at the end of every month... since we (mommy) appreciate the value in having enough money, you can understand our (mommy's) initial twinge of excitement after reading busymom today (a blog mommy really enjoys reading because it reminds her of how glad she is that the two big boys are no longer the two little boys, because, and i quote, raising kids can be a real pain-in-the-ass. she also thinks busymom is pretty dang funny/relevant) hmmm, now where was i? oh yeah... money.

so today 4busymom3 is featuring an opportunity for folks who blog to make money doing something many of 'em do anyway... bitchbitchbitch. mommy's into that, altho' she's not quite sure she's gonna try her hand, for reasons that will become clear as soon as i tell you what they are:
manymany years ago, mommy and her sister (the veryveryverysmart dr. terri) used to enjoy something they call gambling. mind you, they were not guilty of gambling on a regular basis, but, from time-to-time, they thought it was quite a little bit of fun. now, mom's sister (the vvvs dr. terri) and her husband (the vvvs & vvvcute dr. billy) own a cabin up in northern california, in a beautiful place called lake almanor (named for three girls, alice, mary, and eleanor, but who gives a shit). less than 2 hours away from lake almanor is reno, nevada... "the biggest little city in the world" -- which is where mommy would fly into whenever she would visit dr. t & dr. b while on vacation. still with me? good.
one summer, mommy and dr. t decided it would be quite a little bit of fun to try their luck on something called a progressive slot machine. the allure here being that the more money one puts in the machine per pull, the greater the chance for a spectacular pay-off (i.e. an chance to win on any one of 3 pay-out lines). now, this sounded just fine to mommy and dr. t. so, they converted some bills into quarters and proceeded to pump the coins into a slot machine... 3 at a time. mommy was in charge of dropping the quarters... dr. t was in charge of pulling the lever. well... a few dollars/pulls into their fun, they hit a snag. mommy broke her rhythm and had only dropped 2 coins before dr. t pulled down on the handle. aieeee, sister, i didn't get all three coins in there yet! are you sure? said dr. t. well, yeah, since i still have coin #3 in my hand. shit. well, maybe it won't matter, we haven't been winning much, anyway. yeah, i'm sure it's fine. finish the pull, and we'll keep going. this is where the story takes an ugly turn, because, after dr. t let go of the lever, of course, 3 sevens came up on the third line, which meant they should have won the grand jackpot, or, $1700 (or so they thought). this is your goddam fault said mommy. oh no, i don't think so, i think you were just too goddam slow with the quarters. it's your fault. uhuh...this is you're f*#kin' fault, you were in too much of a hurry. f*#k you, i was not. well, this went on for a minute or two before the sisters eventually resumed their play. this is where the story takes an even uglier turn, for a lady playing on a machine next to them decided to chirp in with her un-wanted 2 cents. oh...i'd be just sick if i were you 2 girls... that's a whole lot of money. yeah, we know. it would have been nice, but apparently we weren't meant to win $1700 today. $17-hundred? are you insane?? are you idiots?!? look again...well, they did... and that's when they realized they had, in fact, missed out -- by a mere 25 cents -- on seventeen thousand dollars. mommy was very unhappy. mommy's sister (the vvvs dr. terri) was veryvery unhappy. right then and there, they decided that, perhaps, they were not destined to win easy money, and they never gambled again.
the point of this story (for i do have one) is that after that memorable day in reno, nevada, neither mommy nor her sister expect they'll ever win anything... ever. not through gambling, not through the lottery, not even through contests. (for everyone's sake, don't ever ask mommy and/or her sister about the whole kfre/pay your electric bill for a year/reuben gonzalez fiasco). they've resigned themselves to this, and that's... okay.
whew! i don't know about you, but after all this talk about money, i'm spent.


"Depend on the rabbit's foot if you will, but remember it didn't work for the rabbit." ~ R.E. Shay

2 Comments:

Blogger Busy Mom said...

Ouch, on the $17K!

11/1/06 11:32 PM  
Blogger puppytoes said...

thanks! but, ya know, it's only money... of course, it's only 17 thousand dollars worth of money... holy crap! what am i saying? heh heh. guess i'm still bitter : )

18/1/06 6:18 PM  

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