cheesy birthday follow-up...

okay, so yesterday i rambled on (a bit too much, some might say, but screw them because sometimes i just have to go with the consciousness-flow of my brain) about the boy's 25th birthday and mommy's self-imposed descent into the pits of hell whenever she has to decorate the requisite birthday cake. i'm already sick of this subject -- especially since i'm probably gonna have to write about it again in march -- but, it does seem fitting for me to, at the very least, tell ya how the stupid lame-ass cake turned out, doesn't it? well, did i mention stupid? lame-ass? then i'm guessing you've already got an idea of how all this went. but, in case your imaginations are incapable of conjuring up visions of something both stupid and lame-ass, i'll go ahead and tell you. i shall also illustrate with some stupid lame-ass pictures, just to make sure all this lame-ass stupidity is crystal clear. here goes:

boy #2 got so tired of hearing mommy yip about the cake, he decided it might be nice to help (what's up with that?). he also decided it might be nice to do something really special in order to commerate the occasion of a 25th birthday. and, since he's more of an actual artist than, say, mommy, he was more than willing to conceptualize a theme and then work his own artistic magic on the cake's canvas of frosting... maybe a picture of wrestlers... or, how 'bout the front of a quarter--you know? 25 cents? only make it 25 years?? get it? or, i know! a picture of matt looking like al pacino in scarface... with a big cigar in his mouth! that would be soooo cool!

of course, since mommy forgot to buy more decorating frosting tubes at the store, and had, therefore, only the colors blue and chocolate to work with (along with a couple of pastry pens, which won't do shit on a cake) she astutely realized that none of the aforementioned suggestions were possible. so mommy, sentimental fool that she can be, persuaded boy #2 that it might, instead, be "cute" to take the birthday boy back to a time he was but a tiny lad... are you mommy's precious little monkey? no, mommy, i not a monkey. i a punkin. i'd like to mention here that mommy actually got a little misty-eyed recanting this adorable exhange. i'd like to, but i won't, because i'm sure you'd find it boring. anyway, a theme, of sorts, was finally agreed upon. yep-- mommy and the boy decided to go with a monkey. a monkey. a monkey would adorn the birthday cake. the french vanilla/fudge brownie birthday cake with dark chocolate frosting filling and fluffy white frosting on the outside. the birthday cake that took mommy several hours to mix/bake/frost. they put a monkey on that cake. a monkey, holding a little beer can and smoking a blue candle/cigar. now, isn't that special?

are you wondering how (and if) this story ends? well, it ends a little somthing like this: cake; decorated. candles; lit. boy; called upstairs from the basement, where he'd been playing video games all evening. candles; blown out. cake; devoured. (tho', sadly, not by me. ya know... that whole chocolate/dangerous to puppies thing? still, trust me, it looked delicious. the actual cake part, i mean, not the monkey). and, when all was said and sang and done, a good time was had by all. the end.

now, kids, as you've, no doubt, imagined, there are manymanymany more important/interesting things going on in the world today ... okay, maybe not important, but certainly more fun/tv gossipy/interesting than this ridicuous story of a birthday cake gone monkey. like: is the cast of friends actually coming back to do a series of specials for the peacock network? are the nbc execs responsible for possibly bringing back friends the same rat-bastards that decided to cancel the west wing? (my people could tell you stories about this network. they could, but they won't) will mommy and daddy ever get over showtime's cancellation of dead like me, of one of the bestbestbest shows ever in the history of smart/fun/engaging programs? speaking of monkeys, who decides which shows are gonna stick around and which ones are gonna get the axe, anyway? there are answers to these questions, kids... answers i tell you! but not here. no, you'll have to check out gossip-mongering daddy for that kind of stuff...on 4bobo banjoey3. so you do that, and i'll go find something else to do. like find out who's freakin' toes at nbc i need to bite.

"Dealing with network executives is like being nibbled to death by ducks." ~ Eric Sevareid